NG Santillan
grew up aspiring to pursue careers unrelated to art, such as a firefighter or singer. Before turning 13, art was more of a hobby than a passion. Despite her father's push towards mariachi music, she realized art came naturally to her, unlike singing. Drawing anime characters with her cousin Fatima sparked her passion. The turning point was when NG accurately free-handed an anime character she had on her laptop screen for reference. After finishing it, she lined up her drawing to her laptop realizing her natural talent for drawing. She shifted from choir to art class in 7th grade, receiving encouragement to pursue art as a career by teachers, friends, strangers, and loved ones. Despite initial aspirations for a career in graphic design for Disney, she lost interest during further research into the career. At 16, a friend suggested tattooing, a field she loved since childhood when at four years old she saw her classmate’s dad covered in tattoos. Despite initial concerns about disappointing her parents by not attending college, she embraced tattoo artistry for its individuality. Researching the field deepened her love for it. While initially aiming for a tattoo artist license, life experiences led her to aspire to do more for her tattoo career. By helping people of color and those from her community pursue their dreams of becoming full time artists, this made her feel whole. Today, her goal is to build an art community and support aspiring artists in Oklahoma. She is actively learning and networking with the LA art community to enhance her impact and share her knowledge back home.
A typical routine she follows before getting creative is tapping into a version of herself that is confident in what she’s about to do, a process she still struggles with. Essentially, she “fakes it until I make it”, a practice she dislikes— she aspires to be fully tapped into her confidence. Though she’s still grappling with this, her confidence has grown by consistently putting in effort, regardless of how she feels about it initially. Throughout her process, She is her own worst critic, but as she invests more effort, that inner critic diminishes, and the piece improves. While she ends up pleased with the outcome, she continues to seek opportunities for learning and improvement in each piece. It’s a cycle familiar to many artists. She rarely faces challenges deciding what to draw because her purpose is always to represent her Hispanic community.
NG said she’s always open to constructive criticism. Purposefully, she seeks input on her artwork, business/life decisions, from coworkers, art friends, non-creative friends, and even clients. She never lets pride get in the way or takes offense; she always considers people's advice, even if she doesn't agree with it initially. If she finds their advice isn’t working, she doesn't push it in anyone’s face, claiming they were wrong. Instead, she tries it, and if it doesn’t suit her, she explores other options, constantly cycling through this process. She can confidently say that 80% of her growth is because she applies people's advice to her life in general. She never acts like she knows everything or gets upset about revisiting fundamentals, even if it feels like a step backward. She believes learning, even something you thought you knew, is never a setback. Currently, she’s trying to learn the skill of freehanding her artwork, similar to before she started tattooing. She wants to draw without references, solely from her brain, to explore the unique style that emerges from her imagination. As always, she aims to represent her culture in her artwork. Once she feels confident in creating larger-scale pieces, she hopes to delve more into activist artwork.
NG’s mural with Jaiye in November 2023 came right after she found out about her homie's death, and she was recovering from a car wreck that same week. She was still recuperating from another crash three weeks before that one, with the awareness that she would be moving states in a month. Originally planning a substantial wall mural with Jaiye, they had to scale it down due to torn ligaments in her neck. She was supposed to be resting in bed, but this mural had been in the making for months, just trying to coordinate their schedules. Despite the pain, she needed something to divert her mind.
Jaiye was incredibly understanding about her situation and emotions, allowing her to grieve throughout their collaboration. He even let her play her homie's favorite rapper, making it feel like her friend was there working through her. It was her first mural, a 'let's just go for it' decision. Admittedly, she didn't do much research, but Jaiye's encouragement and support made her feel like she knew what she was doing. Dealing with mental health and family problems, she felt at a low point, doubting her ability to give her 100%. Jaiye's comforting presence allowed her to do what she could and give her best. To her surprise, she did better than expected, sparking a new flame in her. The experience elevated her confidence, showing she could exceed her own expectations and succeed in any art medium with effort and passion.
She’s currently working on artwork for her friends. She wanted to create artwork in remembrance of her friend that she lost. At the same time, she’s working to improve her freehand, straight-from-the-dome artwork. She’s not focusing on a big project alone; instead, she’s working on building her imagination and creating artwork to honor her homie. Additionally, she’s working on pieces for her other friends who have lost somebody.
NG’s feels connected with her audience no matter their background. Before, she created a lot of 'sad girl payasas' as part of her personal expression. Now, she focuses on creating 'happy, smiling, laughing payasas.' Payasas have always been her go-to because she sees herself as one in any situation. Whether she’s sad, mad, or frustrated, her coping mechanism is laughter. So, her default personal expression embodies the concept of 'smile now, cry later,' but also includes a touch of 'cry now, smile later.' She believes it's okay to acknowledge and sit with your sadness, as it allows you to find joy later. This, she feels, is something anyone can relate to.
“I’ve really been on some 'Let go and let God' lately because I've honestly exceeded the expectations I had when I first started at 17, which was almost 5 years ago. I definitely have a mission to accomplish, like going back home to Oklahoma and spreading knowledge, having my own spot where any kind of artists can kick it for art nights, create, network, and learn from each other. I just want to work towards that vision. I’m thinking it’ll take me at least two more years until I can do that and have my own building for that. For now, I’m working on my build-up and just going with the flow, because that’s what's gotten me so far already—just listening to my gut, finding where I feel at my best, and forcing myself into those environments. That's where I'm naturally growing and exceeding what I thought I could do. That’s why I just pray to God he puts me around genuine people that help me thrive and where I can help others thrive as well. And just keep pushing from there. That alone has worked wonders for me.”
NG wants to be part of the reason for keeping the culture alive. As of right now, her artwork is simply a representation of her culture. Later on, she aims to create more activist artwork—pieces that speak to people, rather than just representing her culture.
NG’s advice to future creatives, “It sounds cliché, but after every failure, instead of beating yourself up about it, learn what it’s teaching you. Understand what you can do better next time. Take into consideration everyone’s advice, even if you don’t agree. Sometimes, pride blinds you, and initially, you may not agree, but later on, you might realize they were right. Always trust the process with your art and your growth. There’s always room for more knowledge, and it’s okay to go back and study your art fundamentals. I didn’t realize I needed to until I forced myself to go backward and relearn the fundamentals of a portrait.”
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